I have decided on a halloween costume. I will be the original wolfman. Lena said she would help me with it. So i feel confident it will come out well. Shes good at that stuff. This is the first year i have felt like dressing up in awhile(mainly because i have no one yelling at me telling me i have to haha) its gonna be fun. Jessica and dustinapos;s house should be alot of fun. The last few times ive been there have been a blast. And i dont have to worry about anyone being that i dont like.
in other news i have been really lonely latley which is expected. But i want to meet someone new. I want to have the butterflies again. I dont want to have to love someone who doesnt love me back. Its a hard pill to swallow. Nothing bad againest amber she just doesnt. And i have to move on. It wont be easy i know last time it didnt take me long lol but this time around im gonna take my time and find the right girl for me. Not some filler. Not that i feel thats what jocelen was filler i just met her at the wrong time. And there was someone who i liked but they have a boyfriend which completely elimnates me hitting on them cause im not that kind of guy. I just want to take someone out and feel like there not gonna be annoyed with me. Amber(not that i blame her) treats me like im annoying and she always gets frustrated with me its really messed with my mind in the since that i feel like im annoying everyone and they dont want to be around me. I find myself apologising all the time even when it isnt warranted 90 of the time. Anyways im growing and im in no rush.
work has been getting better and better. I like my apt and its starting to feel like home. Its alway nice to have people around. Im happy and i cant wait to start school again. I know its been a longtime and im nervous but ill be ok i always land on my feet. I like who i am and i think i have alot to offer. I see people learning things and going to school and i want that. Watchinig trin go to her massage school and learning all of these things and using makes me jealous honestly and makes me want to be in school so i can say i learned this today. Its a good thing. Well that is all i feel alot better now.
bye
for now
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